a frosty french bull dog

Bob’s birthday cake is a replica of his French Bull Dog, Lola. Unfortunately the bitch doesn’t look too appetizing…. 

a hearty mystery

The menu said “Cream of Chicken with Rice.” Peas were never mentioned. And yet…

Perhaps a little “Exorcist” inside joke just in time for Halloween? 

Thanks Eric.

morning joy

This submission from Davinia came with only the caption “why I love grocery shopping and waking up late.” I love both of those things too, but all my first meal consists of in the morning is two luke warm cherry Pop Tarts. Something isn’t adding up….

happy boy

There is something slightly disturbing about the product design of Happy Boy Margarine. It looks like something you would find as a substitute for lube at your local sex shop…

…that can also make your muffins taste better than anything else you’ve ever eaten. Viva la happy boy!

only in chelsea…

The obvious allusion to hot man ass only makes the steam coming from these buns that much more disturbing. 

Thanks Mary.

vietnamese snacks

The fact that these coconut cookies resemble maggots and intestines doesn’t deter me from wanting to snack on these curious confections.

Thanks Keith.

picture of the week

Thanks Maya.

things to love about greece: gyros!

Put down that cheap imitation from the mall and allow me to introduce to you a real gyro. Often times the gyro from Greece will be stuffed to capacity with lamb or chicken, tzatziki, french fries, onions and tomato. Not sure if you are eating an authentic Greek gyro? No worries! If your genitalia becomes erect while eating the gyro, that means that you are eating an authentic Greek gyro sandwich. Opa.

maine attraction

I have been seduced by the state of Maine for the last week. Breathtaking views, delectable eats and hot bods made me forget about the rest of the world for a short time. Below, a breakdown of the treasures that Maine has to offer. 

If you find yourself in Maine, be sure to pick out some fresh lobster right off the boat, like this little guy. 

The view of the ocean right outside my window and the persistent quietness made me forget about the constant motorcycles, loud Pentecostal congregation and incessant construction in my Brooklyn neighborhood. Life doesn’t need to be so complicated. 

Leave the irony at the door, kids. Maine offers hot bods and real people in abundance…

miss havisham’s garden

My mother’s tomato plants resemble props for an upcoming Tim Burton film.